明星资讯腾讯娱乐2018年04月21日 00:15:49
1. Read a Book1. 看本好书Head to your local library and get yourself a library card, which is free. Many libraries now have lending services for ebooks, too, making it even easier to sneak a few moments of quiet relaxing time. Even if you#39;re not a big er, you might be surprised by how calming it is to simply sit and get lost in a few pages.到家附近的图书馆,办张免费的借书卡。许多图书馆甚至开通了电子图书务,使你能够更好地享受静坐阅读的时间。即使你不是一个爱看书的人,你也会惊讶于静坐看书,沉浸书本所带来的舒适和宁静。2. Go For a Walk2. 散个小步Anytime you are feeling like you just can#39;t take anymore, head outdoors for a brisk walk. Getting your body moving is a great way to destress and let your brain work through your problems. Or grab a friend and chat away while pounding the pavement.当你无法承受压力的时候,出门散个步。活动身体能够减压并让大脑理清思路。散步的时候也可以叫上一个朋友,一边聊天,一边活络身体。3. Meditate3. 来个冥想Find a quiet corner, and tune out for five minutes. Set a timer on your phone, and enjoy sitting in silence, download a self-guided meditation routine.找个安静的角落,放松五分钟。用手机定个时,享受静坐,下载一段冥想词引导自己进入冥想状态。4. Watch the Sunset (or Sunrise)4. 看场日落(或日出)We spend a lot of time working hard, which means getting outdoors isn#39;t always at the top of the daily must-do list. On seriously stressful days, make time to watch the sunset — without your phone. Turn it off and sit while taking in the wonders of nature and celebrating the end of your long day.我们每天都在卖力地工作,所以出门放松很少会被提上日程安排。但压力实在大的时候,不要带手机,去看个日落。坐下来欣赏大自然的美景,庆祝漫长的一天终于结束了。5. Sing a Song5. 唱个小曲Even if you#39;re not a professional crooner, sing a song. Turn the radio up and sing along to your favorite tune, or hit the town for some karaoke. And singing gets your blood pumping — due to the deep breaths you take to belt out a tune — which elevates mood.即使你唱歌不好听,没关系,唱首歌吧。把音乐调大,伴着喜欢的曲子唱起来,或者干脆去唱个K。由于唱歌时深呼吸带动了血液循环,你的情绪也会跟着好起来。6. Yoga6. 练套瑜伽You don#39;t have to go to the gym to enjoy a yoga session. A simple Sun Salutation takes a few minutes and can be done just about anywhere. And once you#39;ve memorized the routine, you can relax with a bit of yoga anytime.不是在健身俱乐部里才能练瑜伽。一套简单的瑜伽仅仅花费几分钟,所以在哪都可以练习。一旦你熟悉了动作,任何时候都可以做瑜伽来放松。7. Smile7. 笑一笑Simply smiling causes the brain to behave differently, transforming that stressed-out feeling into happiness. Call a friend who always makes you laugh, watch a silly movie, or just force yourself to smile, which tricks your brain into thinking everything is OK, even when you#39;re feeling totally stressed out.笑一笑能使大脑变得不一样,从压力重重变得快乐起来。打个电话给能经常逗你开心的朋友,看部搞笑的电影,或者简单地强迫自己笑,这些都能改变大脑的运作,即使你已经压力山大了,笑一笑也能使大脑觉得一切都好。8. Dance8. 跳个舞Enjoy a dance party in the comfort of your own home, or find the perfect place to get your groove on. Dancing is fun, and you can do it anywhere. So crank the tunes and shake your booty. You#39;ll be feeling stress-free in no time.在家或者找个能让你动起来的地方跳个舞。跳舞使人开心,而且你可以在任何地方跳。所以打开音乐,扭动身体,你马上就会变得轻松起来。9. Hot Bath9. 泡个热水澡There#39;s nothing more soothing than running a hot bath. While you#39;re soaking, let go of the stress of your day. For a really relaxing treat, add several drops of your favorite scented oil.没有什么比洗个热水澡更能让人放松的了。当你全身浸泡在水里的时候,一天的压力就都不见了。为了更加享受,你也可以加几滴芳香的精油。10. Write About It10. 随意写写When you#39;re feeling run down, take a few minutes to write about what#39;s bugging you. Or start a daily journal and dedicate time every day to writing, which helps calm frazzled nerves. Or get creative and write a short story!当你情绪低落时,花几分钟时间写下那些让你烦恼的事,或者每天写日记,安排一段时间来随意写写,这能帮助你放松紧张的神经。说不定你还能灵感大发,写出一个小故事呢。 /201212/217550

This month#39;s court decision in the Li Yang domestic abuse divorce case has caused me to reflect back to what was the most troubled and confusing relationship of my own life.本月宣判的李阳家暴离婚案让我想起了自己生活中最烦恼、最困惑的一段感情。While the abuse in my case was never as severe as what Li Yang#39;s wife faced, still my relationship forced me to deeply question to what lengths I would allow myself to be mistreated.尽管我当时受到的伤害绝没有李阳妻子遭遇的那么严重,然而,我的经历仍让我陷入了深思──我到底能忍耐自己被虐待多久?I#39;ve never publicly spoken or written about that relationship as it#39;s such a personal matter. But if my story can help one person get out of a dangerous situation, I#39;m willing to share it.我从来没有公开讲述过或写过那段感情,因为这完全是一件私事。但是如果我的故事能够帮助哪怕一个人脱离这种危险的境遇,我愿意和大家分享这段往事。Understanding abuse了解虐待When we think of abuse, we often think of those horrible news stories and Weibo photos of women who#39;ve been physically disfigured by abuse.当我们提到虐待的时候,我们往往会联想起关于那些被打得鼻青脸肿的女性的可怕新闻报道和微图片。But not all abuse is physical. While women are more commonly the victims of abuse, men also are often victims- especially of emotional abuse. And emotional abuse can be just as destructive, and even more confusing to understand.然而,并不是所有的虐待都是身体上的。而且,虽然女性更经常成为虐待的受害者,但男性也常常是受害者──特别是精神虐待(emotional abuse)的受害者。精神虐待可能带来同样的破坏性,甚至更令人费解。It#39;s confusing because often the hardest step in getting away from abuse is recognizing when a relationship is abusive. After all, you can#39;t address a problem you don#39;t know is there. That#39;s why it#39;s so useful that in his book The New Rules of Marriage, best-selling author and psychologist Dr. Terrence Real defines abuse:精神虐待令人费解是因为在摆脱虐待的过程中,最困难的一步就是识别它。毕竟,对尚未意识到的问题,你无从下手。心理学家特伦斯?里尔士(Terrence Real)在其畅销书《婚姻新规则》(The New Rules of Marriage)中对虐待行为做出了如下定义:Yelling and screaming(1)呼来喝去,大吼大叫。Name-calling: Any sentence that begins with #39;You are a...#39;(2)恶言相向,说任何以“你这个……”开头的句子。Shaming or humiliating: Communicating that someone is a bad or worthless person. Ridiculing someone, mocking, being sarcastic, humoring or being patronizing.(3)羞辱或侮辱,说别人品行恶劣或一无是处。嘲笑、讥讽、挖苦别人、乱开玩笑或自视过高。Telling another adult what she should do, or how she should think or feel.(4)对另一位成年人指手画脚,告诉她该怎么做、怎么想或作何感受。Making promises and breaking them.(5)信誓旦旦,却言而无信。Lying or manipulating: Deliberately falsifying information or dishonestly changing your behavior in an attempt to control your partner, for example: #39;Don#39;t worry about me. I#39;ll be fine out here in the rain. You go have a good time.#39;(6)撒谎或摆布别人:故意歪曲事实或者欺骗性地改变行事方法,以达到控制伴侣的目的。诸如:“别担心我。我淋着雨也没关系。去吧,你玩得开心点。”When I this definition, my first reaction was:当我读到上述定义的时候,我的第一反应是:These behaviors are abuse?难道这些行为都算得上虐待?But they happen all the time!这些都稀松平常啊!But then I thought: he#39;s right.不过,我随后意识到,里尔士是正确的。The behaviors he outlines are warning signs that a physically abusive relationship may develop. And, in and of themselves, they ARE abuse.他列举的上述行为都是将来可能出现身体虐待的预警信号。并且,这些行为本身就是虐待行为。 /201303/228202

  So I want to start by offering you a free no-tech life hack, and all it requires of you is this: that you change your posture for two minutes. But before I give it away, I want to ask you to right now do a little audit of your body and what you#39;re doing with your body. So how many of you are sort of making yourselves smaller? Maybe you#39;re hunching, crossing your legs, maybe wrapping your ankles. Sometimes we hold onto our arms like this. Sometimes we sp out. I see you. So I want you to pay attention to what you#39;re doing right now. We#39;re going to come back to that in a few minutes, and I#39;m hoping that if you learn to tweak this a little bit, it could significantly change the way your life unfolds.首先我想要提供给你们一个免费的、非科技的人生窍门。你只需这样做:改变你的姿势两分钟。但在我要把它告诉你们之前,我想要请你们,就你们的身体和你们身体的行为做一下自我审查,那么你们之中有多少人正蜷缩着自己?或许你现在弓着背,还翘着二郎腿?或者双臂交叉,有时候我们像这样抱住自己,有时候展开双臂,我看到你了,现在请大家专心在自己的身上,我们等一下就会回溯刚刚的事,希望你们可以稍微改变一下,这会让你的生活变得很不一样。So, we#39;re really fascinated with body language, and we#39;re particularly interested in other people#39;s body language. You know, we#39;re interested in, like, you know — an awkward interaction, or a smile, or a contemptuous glance, or maybe a very awkward wink, or maybe even something like a handshake.所以,我们真的很执着于肢体语言,特别是对别人的肢体语言感兴趣。你看,我们对尴尬的互动,或一个微笑,或轻蔑的一瞥,或奇怪的眨眼,甚至是握手之类的事情感兴趣。Narrator: Here they are arriving at Number 10, and look at this lucky policeman gets to shake hands with the President of the ed States. Oh, and here comes the Prime Minister of the — ? No. (Laughter) (Applause) (Laughter) (Applause)解说员:他们来到了唐宁街10号,看看这个,这位幸运的警员可以和美国总统握手。噢,还有,来自……的总理?不(笑声) (掌声) (笑声) (掌声)Amy Cuddy: So a handshake, or the lack of a handshake, can have us talking for weeks and weeks and weeks. Even the B and The New York Times. So obviously when we think about nonverbal behavior, or body language -- but we call it nonverbals as social scientists -- it#39;s language, so we think about communication. When we think about communication, we think about interactions. So what is your body language communicating to me? What#39;s mine communicating to you?Amy Cuddy:所以一个握手,或没有握手,我们都可以大聊特聊一番。即使B和纽约时报也不例外。我们说到肢体行为或肢体语言时,我们将之归纳为社会科学,它就是一种语言,所以我们会想到沟通,当我们想到沟通,我们就想到互动,所以你现在的身体语言正在告诉我什么?我的身体又是在向你传达什么?And there#39;s a lot of reason to believe that this is a valid way to look at this. So social scientists have spent a lot of time looking at the effects of our body language, or other people#39;s body language, on judgments. And we make sweeping judgments and inferences from body language. And those judgments can predict really meaningful life outcomes like who we hire or promote, who we ask out on a date. For example, Nalini Ambady, a researcher at Tufts University, shows that when people watch 30-second soundless clips of real physician-patient interactions, their judgments of the physician#39;s niceness predict whether or not that physician will be sued. So it doesn#39;t have to do so much with whether or not that physician was incompetent, but do we like that person and how they interacted? Even more dramatic, Alex Todorov at Princeton has shown us that judgments of political candidates#39; faces in just one second predict 70 percent of U.S. Senate and gubernatorial race outcomes, and even, let#39;s go digital, emoticons used well in online negotiations can lead to you claim more value from that negotiation. If you use them poorly, bad idea. Right? So when we think of nonverbals, we think of how we judge others, how they judge us and what the outcomes are. We tend to forget, though, the other audience that#39;s influenced by our nonverbals, and that#39;s ourselves.有很多理由让我们相信这些是有效的。社会科学家花了很多时间,求肢体语言的效果,或其它人的身体语言在判断方面的效应。而我们环视身体语言中的讯息做决定和推论,这些结论可以预测生活中很有意义的结果,像是我们雇用谁或给谁升职,邀请谁出去约会。举例而言,Tufts大学的研究员,Nalini Ambady表示,人们观赏一部医生和患者互动的30秒无声影片,他们对该医生的和善观感,可用来预测该复健师是否会被告上法庭,跟这个医生能否胜任工作没有太大关系,重点是我们喜不喜欢他,和他们是如何与人互动的? 进一步来说,普林斯顿的Alex Todorov表示,我们对政治人物脸部的喜好判断,大概可用来对美国参议院和美国州长的,竞选结果做70%的预测,甚至就网络上在线聊天时使用的表情符号,可以帮助你从交谈中得到更多信息。所以你千万别弄巧成拙,对吧?当我们提起肢体语言,我们就想到自己如何判断别人,别人如何判断我们以及后果会是什么,我们往往忘记这点,受到肢体动作所影响的那群观众,就是我们自己。We are also influenced by our nonverbals, our thoughts and our feelings and our physiology. So what nonverbals am I talking about? I#39;m a social psychologist. I study prejudice, and I teach at a competitive business school, so it was inevitable that I would become interested in power dynamics. I became especially interested in nonverbal expressions of power and dominance.我们也往往受自己的肢体动作、想法、感觉和心理所影响,所以究竟我的非语言表达到底说的是什么?我是一位社会心理学家,我研究偏见。我在一所极具竞争力的商业学院上课,因此无可避免地对权力动力学感到着迷,特别是在非语言表达,对权力和配的领域。And what are nonverbal expressions of power and dominance? Well, this is what they are. So in the animal kingdom, they are about expanding. So you make yourself big, you stretch out, you take up space, you#39;re basically opening up. It#39;s about opening up. And this is true across the animal kingdom. It#39;s not just limited to primates. And humans do the same thing. (Laughter) So they do this both when they have power sort of chronically, and also when they#39;re feeling powerful in the moment. And this one is especially interesting because it really shows us how universal and old these expressions of power are. This expression, which is known as pride, Jessica Tracy has studied. She shows that people who are born with sight and people who are congenitally blind do this when they win at a physical competition. So when they cross the finish line and they#39;ve won, it doesn#39;t matter if they#39;ve never seen anyone do it. They do this. So the arms up in the V, the chin is slightly lifted. What do we do when we feel powerless? We do exactly the opposite. We close up. We wrap ourselves up. We make ourselves small. We don#39;t want to bump into the person next to us. So again, both animals and humans do the same thing. And this is what happens when you put together high and low power. So what we tend to do when it comes to power is that we complement the other#39;s nonverbals. So if someone is being really powerful with us, we tend to make ourselves smaller. We don#39;t mirror them. We do the opposite of them.权力和配的非语言表达究竟是什么?嗯,让我细细道来。在动物王国里,它们和扩张有关。所以你尽可能得让自己变大,你向外伸展占满空间,基本上就是展开。关于展开,我说真的,透视动物世界,这不仅局限于灵长类,人类也干同样的事(笑声)。不论是他们长期掌权或是在某个时间点感到权力高涨,他们都这么做,特别有趣的原因是,它让我们明白权力的展现从来是如此地一致,不管古今世界。这种展现,被认为是一种荣耀。 Jessica Tracy研究表示,视力良好无碍和先天视障的人在赢得比赛时都做了同样的事。当他们跨过终点线赢得比赛之际,无论能否看的见,他们都做这样的动作,双臂呈V字型朝上,下巴微微抬起,那我们感到无助的时候呢?我们的行为正相反,我们封闭起来。我们把自己蜷起来,让自己变得小一点,最好别碰到别人。这再一次明,人类和动物都做同样的事,这就是当你有力量和没力量时的行为,所以当力量来临时,我们会迎合别人的非语言表达,当别人的权势比我们大很多时,我们倾向把自己变得较小,不会模仿他们,我们做和他们正相反的事情。So I#39;m watching this behavior in the classroom, and what do I notice? I notice that MBA students really exhibit the full range of power nonverbals. So you have people who are like caricatures of alphas, really coming into the room, they get right into the middle of the room before class even starts, like they really want to occupy space. When they sit down, they#39;re sort of sp out. They raise their hands like this. You have other people who are virtually collapsing when they come in. As soon they come in, you see it. You see it on their faces and their bodies, and they sit in their chair and they make themselves tiny, and they go like this when they raise their hand. I notice a couple of things about this. One, you#39;re not going to be surprised. It seems to be related to gender. So women are much more likely to do this kind of thing than men. Women feel chronically less powerful than men, so this is not surprising. But the other thing I noticed is that it also seemed to be related to the extent to which the students were participating, and how well they were participating. And this is really important in the MBA classroom, because participation counts for half the grade.当我在课堂上观察这种现象时,你猜我发现什么?我发现MBA的学生真的很会充分利用肢体语言,你会看到有些人像是统治者。走进房间,课程开始之前一屁股坐在正中间,好像他们真的很想占据整个教室似的,当他们坐下的时候,身体会展开,像这样举手。有些人则不然,他们一走进来你就会发现,从他们的脸和身体你会发现,他们坐在椅子上的时候把自己变得很萎靡,然后举手的时候是这种姿势。我观察到很多事情,其中一件,不令人惊讶,就是跟性别差异有关,女人比男人更容易出现这种状况,女人一般比较容易比男人感到无力,这并不太令人意外。然而我发现的另一件事是,这似乎也跟学生参与的程度高低有关,就MBA的课来说这真的非常重要。因为课堂参与程度要占成绩的一半。So business schools have been struggling with this gender grade gap. You get these equally qualified women and men coming in and then you get these differences in grades, and it seems to be partly attributable to participation. So I started to wonder, you know, okay, so you have these people coming in like this, and they#39;re participating. Is it possible that we could get people to fake it and would it lead them to participate more?所以商学院一直以来都为此伤脑筋,入学的时候男生女生都是一样优秀的,可是成绩出来却有这些性别差异,而看起来却有一部分原因和参与度有关。所以我开始思索,好吧,这群人一开始进来是这样,他们参与其中,那有没有可能让大家来假装,让他们更加参与进来?So my main collaborator Dana Carney, who#39;s at Berkeley, and I really wanted to know, can you fake it till you make it? Like, can you do this just for a little while and actually experience a behavioral outcome that makes you seem more powerful? So we know that our nonverbals govern how other people think and feel about us. There#39;s a lot of evidence. But our question really was, do our nonverbals govern how we think and feel about ourselves?我在Berkeley的主要合作研究伙伴,Dana Carney。我很想知道,你能假装直到你成功吗?譬如说,只做一下下然后就体验到一个,让你感到更加充满力量的结果,所以得知非语言表达如何掌控他人对我们的想法和感受。有很多据可以明。但我们的问题是,我们非语言的部分是否真的掌控我们对自己的想法和感受?There#39;s some evidence that they do. So, for example, we smile when we feel happy, but also, when we#39;re forced to smile by holding a pen in our teeth like this, it makes us feel happy. So it goes both ways. When it comes to power, it also goes both ways. So when you feel powerful, you#39;re more likely to do this, but it#39;s also possible that when you pretend to be powerful, you are more likely to actually feel powerful.这里确实有些据可以表明。举例来说,当我们高兴的时候我们会笑,但同样地,当我们含着一只笔练习笑容的时候,我们也会感到开心。这说明这是相互的。说到力量的时候亦是如此。所以当我们感到充满力量的时候,你更加可能会这样做,但你也可能假装自己很有力量,然后真的感到力量强大。So the second question really was, you know, so we know that our minds change our bodies, but is it also true that our bodies change our minds? And when I say minds, in the case of the powerful, what am I talking about? So I#39;m talking about thoughts and feelings and the sort of physiological things that make up our thoughts and feelings, and in my case, that#39;s hormones. I look at hormones. So what do the minds of the powerful versus the powerless look like? So powerful people tend to be, not surprisingly, more assertive and more confident, more optimistic. They actually feel that they#39;re going to win even at games of chance. They also tend to be able to think more abstractly. So there are a lot of differences. They take more risks. There are a lot of differences between powerful and powerless people. Physiologically, there also are differences on two key hormones: testosterone, which is the dominance hormone, and cortisol, which is the stress hormone. So what we find is that high-power alpha males in primate hierarchies have high testosterone and low cortisol, and powerful and effective leaders also have high testosterone and low cortisol. So what does that mean? When you think about power, people tended to think only about testosterone, because that was about dominance. But really, power is also about how you react to stress. So do you want the high-power leader that#39;s dominant, high on testosterone, but really stress reactive? Probably not, right? You want the person who#39;s powerful and assertive and dominant, but not very stress reactive, the person who#39;s laid back.那第二个问题就是,你看,我们知道心理状态会影响我们的身体 那身体是否能影响心理呢?这里所说的心理充满力量究竟指的是什么?我指的是想法和感觉。和可以组成我们想法和感受的实际事物,我这里是指荷尔蒙。我指的是这个。充满力量和没有力量的心智是什么样的呢? 毫不令人意外,心理坚强的人往往比较果断,自信,且乐观,就连在赌注里也觉得他们会赢,他们也倾向于能够抽象地思考,所以这其中有很大区别。他们更敢于冒险。充满力量与否的心智二者存有许多不同,生理上两个关键的贺尔蒙,睾丸酮,是一种配荷尔蒙;可的松,是一种压力荷尔蒙。我们发现灵长类的雄性首领有高浓度的睪丸酮和低浓度的可的松,相同情形也在强而有力的领导人身上可见。这表示什么?当你想到力量,人们往往只想到睪丸酮,因为它代表配统治,但力量其实是在于你如何应对压力,所以你会想要一个有着很高浓度的睪丸酮但同时又高度紧张的领导吗?大概不会是吧?你会希望那个人是充满力量,肯定果断且知道如何配,但不是非常紧张,或是懒洋洋的。So we know that in primate hierarchies, if an alpha needs to take over, if an individual needs to take over an alpha role sort of suddenly, within a few days, that individual#39;s testosterone has gone up significantly and his cortisol has dropped significantly. So we have this evidence, both that the body can shape the mind, at least at the facial level, and also that role changes can shape the mind. So what happens, okay, you take a role change, what happens if you do that at a really minimal level, like this tiny manipulation, this tiny intervention? ;For two minutes,; you say, ;I want you to stand like this, and it#39;s going to make you feel more powerful.;灵长类动物的金字塔里,如果一个首领想要掌控这个种群,或取代原先的首领,几天之内,那一方体内的睪丸酮会大大地上升,而其可的松会剧烈地下降,身体影响心理之例,由此可见一斑。至少就表面而言是如此。同时角色的转换也会影响心智。所以,如果你改变角色,就一个小改变,像这样一个小小的操作,这样一个小小的干预?“持续两分钟”你说,“我要你们这样站着, 它会让你感到更加充满力量。”So this is what we did. We decided to bring people into the lab and run a little experiment, and these people adopted, for two minutes, either high-power poses or low-power poses, and I#39;m just going to show you five of the poses, although they took on only two. So here#39;s one. A couple more. This one has been dubbed the ;Wonder Woman; by the media. Here are a couple more. So you can be standing or you can be sitting. And here are the low-power poses. So you#39;re folding up, you#39;re making yourself small. This one is very low-power. When you#39;re touching your neck, you#39;re really protecting yourself. So this is what happens. They come in, they spit into a vial, we for two minutes say, ;You need to do this or this.; They don#39;t look at pictures of the poses. We don#39;t want to prime them with a concept of power. We want them to be feeling power, right? So two minutes they do this. We then ask them, ;How powerful do you feel?; on a series of items, and then we give them an opportunity to gamble, and then we take another saliva sample. That#39;s it. That#39;s the whole experiment.我们是这样做的。我们决定将人们带进实验室,做一个小实验。这些人将维持有力或无力的姿势两分钟,然后我就会告诉你。这五种姿势,虽然他们只做了两种,这是其一,看看这些,这个被媒体取名为 ;神力女超人; 还有这些,或站或坐,这些是无力的姿势,你双手交叉,试着让自己变小一点,这是非常无力的一张,当你在摸你的脖子,你其实在保护自己。实际的状况是,他们进来取出唾液,维持一个姿势达两分钟,他们不会看到姿势的照片,因为我们不想要影响他们,我们希望他们自己感觉到力量不是吗?所以他们做了整整两分钟,我们关于一些事物问:“现在你觉得自己多有力量?”受试者接着会有一个奕的机会,接着再取得唾液范本,这就是整个实验。So this is what we find. Risk tolerance, which is the gambling, what we find is that when you#39;re in the high-power pose condition, 86 percent of you will gamble. When you#39;re in the low-power pose condition, only 60 percent, and that#39;s a pretty whopping significant difference. Here#39;s what we find on testosterone. From their baseline when they come in, high-power people experience about a 20-percent increase, and low-power people experience about a 10-percent decrease. So again, two minutes, and you get these changes. Here#39;s what you get on cortisol. High-power people experience about a 25-percent decrease, and the low-power people experience about a 15-percent increase. So two minutes lead to these hormonal changes that configure your brain to basically be either assertive, confident and comfortable, or really stress-reactive, and, you know, feeling sort of shut down. And we#39;ve all had the feeling, right? So it seems that our nonverbals do govern how we think and feel about ourselves, so it#39;s not just others, but it#39;s also ourselves. Also, our bodies change our minds.我们发现到风险承担能力,也就是在时,当处于强有力的姿势的时,86%的人会选择,相对处于一个较无力的姿势时,只有60%的人,这真是很令人惊讶的差异。就睪丸酮而言我们发现,这些人进来的那一刻起,有力量的那些人会有20%的提高,无力的人则下降10%。所以,再次地,当你有这些改变,有力的人可的松下降25%, 而无力的人可的松则上升15%。两分钟可以让这些荷尔蒙改变使你的脑袋变得果断、自信和自在,或高度紧张以及感到与世隔绝,我们都曾有过这些体验对吗?看来非语言确实掌控我们对自己的想法和感受,不只是别人,更是我们自己。同时,我们的身体可以改变我们的心理。But the next question, of course, is can power posing for a few minutes really change your life in meaningful ways? So this is in the lab. It#39;s this little task, you know, it#39;s just a couple of minutes. Where can you actually apply this? Which we cared about, of course. And so we think it#39;s really, what matters, I mean, where you want to use this is evaluative situations like social threat situations. Where are you being evaluated, either by your friends? Like for teenagers it#39;s at the lunchroom table. It could be, you know, for some people it#39;s speaking at a school board meeting. It might be giving a pitch or giving a talk like this or doing a job interview. We decided that the one that most people could relate to because most people had been through was the job interview.但下一个问题,当然,就是维持数分钟的姿势,是否真能引导一个更有意义的人生呢?刚刚都只是在实验室里,一个小实验,你知道的只有几分钟。你要怎么实现这一切呢?落实在我们关心的地方呢?我们关心的其实是,我是说,你在那里可以用这些技巧去评估时势,像是社交威胁的情形。譬如说你被人打量时?或者是青少年吃午餐的时候,你知道,对有些人来说就好像在开学校的董事会。有时候是一个小演讲,有时是像这种讲演,或是工作面试时,我们后来决定用一个最多人能做比较的,因为大部分人都曾经面试工作过。So we published these findings, and the media are all over it, and they say, Okay, so this is what you do when you go in for the job interview, right? (Laughter) You know, so we were of course horrified, and said, Oh my God, no, no, no, that#39;s not what we meant at all. For numerous reasons, no, no, no, don#39;t do that. Again, this is not about you talking to other people. It#39;s you talking to yourself. What do you do before you go into a job interview? You do this. Right? You#39;re sitting down. You#39;re looking at your iPhone -- or your Android, not trying to leave anyone out. You are, you know, you#39;re looking at your notes, you#39;re hunching up, making yourself small, when really what you should be doing maybe is this, like, in the bathroom, right? Do that. Find two minutes. So that#39;s what we want to test. Okay? So we bring people into a lab, and they do either high- or low-power poses again, they go through a very stressful job interview. It#39;s five minutes long. They are being recorded. They#39;re being judged also, and the judges are trained to give no nonverbal feedback, so they look like this. Like, imagine this is the person interviewing you. So for five minutes, nothing, and this is worse than being heckled. People hate this. It#39;s what Marianne LaFrance calls ;standing in social quicksand.; So this really spikes your cortisol. So this is the job interview we put them through, because we really wanted to see what happened. We then have these coders look at these tapes, four of them. They#39;re blind to the hypothesis. They#39;re blind to the conditions. They have no idea who#39;s been posing in what pose, and they end up looking at these sets of tapes, and they say, ;Oh, we want to hire these people,; -- all the high-power posers -- ;we don#39;t want to hire these people. We also evaluate these people much more positively overall.; But what#39;s driving it? It#39;s not about the content of the speech. It#39;s about the presence that they#39;re bringing to the speech. We also, because we rate them on all these variables related to competence, like, how well-structured is the speech? How good is it? What are their qualifications? No effect on those things. This is what#39;s affected. These kinds of things. People are bringing their true selves, basically. They#39;re bringing themselves. They bring their ideas, but as themselves, with no, you know, residue over them. So this is what#39;s driving the effect, or mediating the effect.我们将这些发现发表出来,接着媒体就大量曝光说,好,所以你去面试时,你得这样做,对吧?(笑声) 我们当然大吃一惊,表示我的天啊,不不不,我们不是这个意思。不管什么原因,不不,千万别这么做,这和你跟别人交谈无关,这是你在和你自己交谈,你在面试工作之前会怎么做?你会这样,对吧?你会做下来,你盯着自己的iphone或者安卓,转移自己的视线,你看着自己的笔记,你把自己蜷缩起来,试着让自己变得小一点,你真正需要做的应该是找个浴室,然后这样,花个两分钟,所以我们想做的是这个,把人带进实验室,他们再次保持有力或无力姿势,接着进行一个高度压力的面试,为时五分钟。所有都会被记录下来,同时也会被,而这些考官都接受过训练,不会给予任何非语言的反馈,所以他们看起来就像这样,像图上所示,想象一下,这个人正在面试你,整整五分钟,什么都没有,这比刁难诘问更难受,大家都不喜欢这种方式。这就是Marianne LaFrance所谓的 ;陷入社交流沙中; 这可以大大激发你的可的松,我们给予受试者这样的面试,因为我们真的想看看会有什么样的结果,接着我们得出下列四种结果,受试者不知假设前提和状况下,没有人知道谁摆什么样的姿势,接着他们观看这些带子,然后他们说,“噢,我们想要录用这些人”——那些摆强有力姿势的人——“这些人我们不想录用”,我们也评量这群人整体而言更正面,但背后的原因是什么?这跟演讲的内容无关,而是他们在演讲中带出来的存在感,同时,我们也就这些关于能力的变动因素评价他们,像是演讲的整体架构怎样?它有多棒?演讲者的照学历?这些全都无关。有影响的是这些事。基本上人们表达真实的自己,就他们自己,他们的想法,当他们心里没有芥蒂,这就是背后真实的力量,或者可以说是计划的结果。So when I tell people about this, that our bodies change our minds and our minds can change our behavior, and our behavior can change our outcomes, they say to me, ;I don#39;t -- It feels fake.; Right? So I said, fake it till you make it. I don#39;t -- It#39;s not me. I don#39;t want to get there and then still feel like a fraud. I don#39;t want to feel like an impostor. I don#39;t want to get there only to feel like I#39;m not supposed to be here. And that really resonated with me, because I want to tell you a little story about being an impostor and feeling like I#39;m not supposed to be here.所以当我告诉人们,我们的身体会改变心理,心理会改变行为,而行为会改变结果,他们跟我说“我不这么觉得——听起来好像是假的”对吗?我就说,你就假装一直到你达成目的为止。不是我啦,我不想要到达到那个目标后仍然感觉像是一个骗局,我不想要成为一个骗子,我一点也不想达到那个目标才发觉我不应该如此,我真是有感而发的。这里跟大家分享一个小故事,关于成为一个骗子然后感到不应该在这里的故事。When I was 19, I was in a really bad car accident. I was thrown out of a car, rolled several times. I was thrown from the car. And I woke up in a head injury rehab ward, and I had been withdrawn from college, and I learned that my I.Q. had dropped by two standard deviations, which was very traumatic. I knew my I.Q. because I had identified with being smart, and I had been called gifted as a child. So I#39;m taken out of college, I keep trying to go back. They say, ;You#39;re not going to finish college. Just, you know, there are other things for you to do, but that#39;s not going to work out for you.; So I really struggled with this, and I have to say, having your identity taken from you, your core identity, and for me it was being smart, having that taken from you, there#39;s nothing that leaves you feeling more powerless than that. So I felt entirely powerless. I worked and worked and worked, and I got lucky, and worked, and got lucky, and worked.在我19岁的时候,发生了一场很严重的车祸。我整个人飞出车外,滚了好几翻,我是弹出车外的,之后在休息室醒来以后发现头部重伤,我从大学里休学,别人告知我智商下降了2个标准差,情况非常非常糟糕,我知道我的智商应该是多少,因为我以前被人家认为是很聪明的那种,小时候大家都觉得我很有才华。当我离开大学时,我试着回去,他们都告诉我说,“你没有办法毕业的。你知道,你还可以做很多其它的事啊,别往死胡同里钻了。”我死命挣扎,我必须承认,当你的认同感被剥夺的时候,那个主要的身分认同,就我而言是我的智力被夺走了,再没有比这个更加无助的时候了,我感到完全的无助,我拼命地疯狂地努力,幸运眷顾,努力,幸运眷顾,再努力。Eventually I graduated from college. It took me four years longer than my peers, and I convinced someone, my angel advisor, Susan Fiske, to take me on, and so I ended up at Princeton, and I was like, I am not supposed to be here. I am an impostor. And the night before my first-year talk, and the first-year talk at Princeton is a 20-minute talk to 20 people. That#39;s it. I was so afraid of being found out the next day that I called her and said, ;I#39;m quitting.; She was like, ;You are not quitting, because I took a gamble on you, and you#39;re staying. You#39;re going to stay, and this is what you#39;re going to do. You are going to fake it. You#39;re going to do every talk that you ever get asked to do. You#39;re just going to do it and do it and do it, even if you#39;re terrified and just paralyzed and having an out-of-body experience, until you have this moment where you say, #39;Oh my gosh, I#39;m doing it. Like, I have become this. I am actually doing this.#39;; So that#39;s what I did. Five years in grad school, a few years, you know, I#39;m at Northwestern, I moved to Harvard, I#39;m at Harvard, I#39;m not really thinking about it anymore, but for a long time I had been thinking, ;Not supposed to be here. Not supposed to be here.;最终我从学校毕业了。我比同学多花了四年的时间,然后说我的恩师,Susan Fiske让我进去,所以我最后进入了普林斯顿。我当时觉得,我不应该在这里,我是个骗子,在我第一年演讲的那个晚上,普林斯顿第一年的演讲,大约是对20个人做20分钟的演讲。就这样,我当时如此害怕隔天被拆穿,所以我打给她说,“我不干了。”她说:“你不可以不干,因为我赌在你身上了,你得留下。你会留下,你将会留下来了。你要骗过所有人。你被要求的每个演讲你都得照办。你得一直讲一直讲,即使你怕死了,脚瘫了,灵魂出窍了,直到你发现你在说,噢,我的天啊,我正在做这件事,我已经成为它的一部分了,我正在做它。”这就是说所做的,硕士的五年,这些年,我在Northwestern,我后来去了哈佛,我在哈佛,我没有在想到它,但之前有很长一段时间我都在想这件事“不应该在这。不应该在这。”So at the end of my first year at Harvard, a student who had not talked in class the entire semester, who I had said, ;Look, you#39;ve gotta participate or else you#39;re going to fail,; came into my office. I really didn#39;t know her at all. And she said, she came in totally defeated, and she said, ;I#39;m not supposed to be here.; And that was the moment for me. Because two things happened. One was that I realized, oh my gosh, I don#39;t feel like that anymore. You know. I don#39;t feel that anymore, but she does, and I get that feeling. And the second was, she is supposed to be here! Like, she can fake it, she can become it. So I was like, ;Yes, you are! You are supposed to be here! And tomorrow you#39;re going to fake it, you#39;re going to make yourself powerful, and, you know, you#39;re gonna — ; (Applause) (Applause) ;And you#39;re going to go into the classroom, and you are going to give the best comment ever.; You know? And she gave the best comment ever, and people turned around and they were like, oh my God, I didn#39;t even notice her sitting there, you know? (Laughter)所以哈佛第一年结束,我对整个学期在课堂上都没有说话的一个学生说:你得参与融入否则你不会过这一科的,来我的办公室吧。其实我压根就不认识她。她说:她很挫败地进来了,她说“我不应该在这里的。”就在此刻,两件事发生了,我突然明白,天啊,我再也没有这种感觉了。你知道吗。我再也不会有那种感觉,但她有,我能体会到她的感受。第二个想法是,她应该在这里!她可以假装,一直到她成功为止。所以我跟她说,“你当然应该!你应该在这里!”明天起你就假装,你要让自己充满力量,你要知道你将会——”(掌声) (掌声)“你要走进教室,你会发表最棒的。”你知道吗?她就真的发表了最成功的,大家都回过神来,他们就好像:喔我的天啊,我竟没有注意到她坐在那里,你知道吗?(笑声)She comes back to me months later, and I realized that she had not just faked it till she made it, she had actually faked it till she became it. So she had changed. And so I want to say to you, don#39;t fake it till you make it. Fake it till you become it. You know? It#39;s not — Do it enough until you actually become it and internalize.几个月后她来找我,我才明白,她不仅只是假装到她成功为止,她已经融会贯通了,整个人脱胎换骨。我想对大家说,不要仅为了成功而假装,要把它溶到你骨子里去。知道吗?持续地做直到它内化到你的骨髓里。The last thing I#39;m going to leave you with is this. Tiny tweaks can lead to big changes. So this is two minutes. Two minutes, two minutes, two minutes. Before you go into the next stressful evaluative situation, for two minutes, try doing this, in the elevator, in a bathroom stall, at your desk behind closed doors. That#39;s what you want to do. Configure your brain to cope the best in that situation. Get your testosterone up. Get your cortisol down. Don#39;t leave that situation feeling like, oh, I didn#39;t show them who I am. Leave that situation feeling like, oh, I really feel like I got to say who I am and show who I am.最后与大家分享的是,小小的调整可以有大大的改变。就两分钟,两分钟,两分钟,两分钟。在你进行下一场紧张的评估之前,拿出两分钟,尝试做这个,电梯里、浴室间,房门关起在你的桌子前面,你就这么做,设置你的脑袋,以发挥最大效益,提升你的睪丸铜,降低你的可的松,千万别留下“噢,我没把最好的表现出来”的那种遗憾,而是留下“噢,我真想让他们知道,让他们看见,我是个怎样的人”的印象。So I want to ask you first, you know, both to try power posing, and also I want to ask you to share the science, because this is simple. I don#39;t have ego involved in this. (Laughter) Give it away. Share it with people, because the people who can use it the most are the ones with no resources and no technology and no status and no power. Give it to them because they can do it in private. They need their bodies, privacy and two minutes, and it can significantly change the outcomes of their life. Thank you. (Applause) (Applause)在这里我想要求大家,你知道的,尝试这有力的姿势,同时也想请求各位把这项科学分享出去,因为它很简单,我可不是自尊心的问题喔(笑声)。放开它。和人分享,因为最经常可以使用它的人会是那些没有资源和技术的一群人,没有社会地位和权势。把这个传达给他们,好让他们可以私下这样做,他们会需要他们的身体、隐私和那两分钟,然后这会大大地改变他们生活的结果。谢谢(掌声) (掌声) /201302/224550



  One day a boy came to his teacher and said: Teacher, pa wants to know if you like roast pig.I certainly do, said the teacher, and you tell your father he is very kind to think of me.Days passed, and nothing more was said about the roast pig.一天有个男孩去对他老师说:老师,我爸想知道你是不是爱吃烤猪肉。当然啰,老师说,去告诉你父亲,多谢他想着我。好几天过去了,再没提起烤猪肉的事儿。Finally the teacher said to the boy: I thought your father was going to send me over some roast pig.Yes, said the boy, he did intend to, but the pig got well.最后老师对男孩说:我以为你父亲要给我送点烤猪肉来呢。是啊,孩子说,他是这么想的,可后来猪又没病了。内容来自: /201304/234942If this isn#39;t the epitome of companionship, we don#39;t know what is.如果这不是相守一生的缩影,我们不知道什么才是。Aly viewed more than a million times since it was uploaded on Monday, this photograph -- which appears to capture a tender moment shared by an elderly couple at a gym -- has been moving many hearts this week.从它周一上传以来已经被浏览了超过一百万次,这张照片——似乎捕捉到了健身房一对老年夫妇共享的温柔一刻——本周已经感动了不少心灵。;He just stood there with her to make sure she was alright,; Reddit user yourbabysdaddy18 wrote in a caption that accompanied this heart-squeezing snap.“他只是和她站在那里,确保她安然无恙,” Reddit用户yourbabysdaddy18在伴随着心跳的说明中写道。;I aspire to one day love a woman enough to stand by her in the gym dressed up in business casual clothing just to make sure she knows someone is always there for her,; wrote Reddit user ;evanos; after glimpsing the photo.“我渴望有一天足够爱一个女人以至于在健身房穿着商务休闲装站在她身边只是为了确保她知道有一个人总是会对她不离不弃,”Reddit用户“evanos”在一瞥照片后写道。 /201304/236928Whether you consider yourself to be financially responsible, or you always seem to come up short on cash, there are a few key indicators that may indicate you are living beyond your mean.不管你觉得自己生活富余还是经常会财政短缺,下面这几个小信号都需要注意一下,它们预示着你可能要财政赤字了哦。And being aware of them can save you loads of money woes in times of a cash emergency.注意这些能帮你省下一大笔钱以备不时之需。You couldn’t live without your job’s income for at least six months.存的薪水不够你花半年Need some motivation to start saving? Sit down and add up how much money you make each month. Then, multiply that amount by six.需要让自己省钱的动力?那就坐下来算算每个月能赚多少钱吧,然后乘以6。Assuming you have a stable job, that’s the minimum balance you should have stashed away in an interest bearing, FDIC insured deposit account that is earmarked solely for emergency needs.假设你的工作很稳定,这些钱是你需要存起来以备不时之需的最低标准,联邦存款保险公司有专为紧急需要的账户。Clients frequently underestimate life’s uncertainties and discount the need to have cash available for unexpected events like unemployment, illness, disabilities, and family emergencies.人们往往会低估人生的不确定性,在遇到突发情况(如事业,疾病,残疾,和家庭紧急情况)时我们对金钱的需求其实很大。If you have a less-than-stable career or you’re self-employed, we recommend saving as much as 12 months worth of income. If you don’t have anything near that amount saved, and worse, you’re in debt, you’re living beyond your means.如果你的工作并不稳定,又或者是自己创业,我们建议至少要存有12个月的收入。如果你的存款没有这么多,甚至还在负债,那么你就已经入不敷出了。You vacation on credit.用信用卡旅游You work hard and you’ve earned that vacation, right?努力工作觉得可以旅个游来犒劳自己啦?Consider this financial rule of thumb when it comes to credit purchases: If it takes you longer to pay for the purchase than the actual “life span” of the item, you can’t really afford it.但如果需要用到信用卡,就想想这个重要的准则吧:如果还款所需的时间比实际的旅游时间还长,算了吧,你其实付不起。Start a plan to save money for vacations well in advance of the time you’ll need to book tickets or make reservations.提前制定旅行计划能省一大笔钱,你需要订票和预约酒店。Make sure you pay the balance down before you’re charged a dime of interest and be realistic about all the “extras” that can add to the cost of a trip, like tips, parking, and baggage fees.确保自己在付利息前能付清所有的钱。记得要把那些小费、停车费和行李费都算进去。You only consider monthly payments when buying a car.买车时只考虑了月收入。Aside from a home, a car is one of the most expensive items you’ll purchase in your life. While it’s understandable to focus on monthly payment amounts when determining how much car you can buy, your ability to afford a monthly auto loan payment doesn’t mean you can afford the car.和房子一样,车子也会是你人生中购买的最贵的东西之一。在决定购买什么价位的车时,月收入的确需要考虑进去,但你能付清每月的车贷并不代表你就能买得起这车。If you’re in doubt, consider the duration of the loan: If it’s longer than three years, and doesn’t result in owning the vehicle outright at the conclusion of the loan, you’re shopping out of your true budget.如果你还对我的话有所怀疑,那不妨想一下还贷期限:但如果还款期限超过了三年,直到还贷结束才真正拥有这辆车,你得基于自己的实际预算来购买。The same premise holds true for auto loan refinancing: If you’re refinancing because interest rates have dropped considerably since you initiated the loan, that may be a money-smart move.车贷重新按揭也是如此:比如由于车贷降息,你选择重新按揭,这是个理财方法。If you are refinancing only to lower your monthly payments, and refinancing means that you are extending the life of the loan, you’re not actually saving money — you’re just stretching out the payments.但如果你重新按揭只是为了减少每月的还贷,同时还贷期限延长,那么你并没有省钱——反而多花了钱。You’ve arrived at the home you can afford based on a 30-year fixed mortgage.买房子,你能付起30年的固定抵押贷款。If you’ve calculated the amount of home you can afford based only a 30-year fixed mortgage scenario, you may be taking on more than you can really afford.考虑买房子的时候,你也许已经算过30年固定抵押贷款所需的金额,但也许比你实际付的还要多。Instead of strapping yourself to a 30-year fixed mortgage payment, consider how much more affordable less house with a shorter loan term is—despite the higher monthly payment.与其把自己绑在30年固定抵押还贷上,不如想想短点贷款期限是不是更省钱——即使月付更高点。By opting for a four percent, 15-year fixed mortgage on a 0,000 home loan over a comparable 30-year fixed loan, a homeowner could save ,020 in interest over the life of the loan. Further, he owns the home in less than two decades.比如25万美金的房子,贷款15年是百分之四的利息,相比于30年而言,房主能省97020美金的利息。更何况不到二十年他就能完全拥有这房子了。You’ve paid an overdraft fee in the last 12 months.过去一年你已经付过透费了。If money is so tight that you have to rely on overdraft protection in order to float your lifestyle, you’re living beyond what you can afford. Period.手头有点紧,不得不靠着透保护来继续这一生活方式,那么你目前已经入不敷出了。You’ve exceeded your credit limit.你已经超了信用卡额度Exceeding your credit limit doesn’t just cost you in over-limit fees.超额使用不仅仅要交付超额费。Because your credit score is based largely on your debt-to-utilization ratio, your credit score is lowered when your credit balances are high and it signals to lenders that you’re in over your head.由于你的信用额度很大程度上基于你的资产负债率,一旦超额使用,你的信用就会降低,会认为这意味着你入不敷出了。If you are approved for new lines of credit—including a home mortgage—your future interest rates will be sky high.如果你申请新的信贷,包括房屋按揭,你将来的利息税就会超高。You’re in debt but you pay someone to do a job you could do yourself.尽管负债,你还是花钱请人来做那些力所能及的小事Are you too busy to clean your house, walk your dog, mow your lawn, or manicure your nails?难道真的忙的没有时间打扫屋子、遛、修剪草坪甚至修指甲吗?Instead of paying someone else for skills you possess, do the task yourself and put the savings toward paying down debt, building your emergency savings accounts and funding your retirement.与其花钱请人干那些你力所能及的活,不如自己干,省下来的钱可以付账单,存入紧急账户或是退休基金。 /201302/224081

  Long before the iPhone made him the god of gadgets, Steve Jobs launched his tech career by hacking land lines to make free long-distance calls.史蒂夫·乔布斯(Steve Jobs)通过iPhone成为电子设备教父,不过他很久之前就开始了高科技事业,做的是盗用本地通话线路从而实现免费远程通话。Bob Dylan’s band, the Golden Chords, lost a high-school talent competition to a tap dancing act.鲍勃·迪伦(Bob Dylan)成为金牌音乐家之前,在高中达人秀比赛中输给了一个踢踏舞表演。Behind every success story is an embarrassing first effort, a stumble, a setback or a radical change of direction. It’s these first clumsy steps on the road to fame and fortune that fascinate writer Seth Fiegerman, who edits the blog OpeningLines.org, a collection of case studies on the origins of famous careers.探究每个成功故事,你总能看到起步时的窘迫,蹒跚前进,被失败打击,或是突然决定转向。这些通往名利财富路上的笨拙的起步吸引了作家塞斯·菲格曼(Seth Fiegerman),她收集了关于成功事业起点的众多案例,并编写了客OpeningLines.org(起步线)。“When you see someone who’s very successful, you almost imagine that it was a foregone conclusion, that they’re a genius, that they were destined for great things, ” says Fiegerman, who began the blog in 2009, after an early setback in his own career. “I think the big takeaway is failure and setbacks, far from being uncommon, are in many ways essential.”2009年,菲格曼在事业受挫后选择开。”当你看到某些成功人士时,你总会想象他们的成功是必然的,他们都是天才,注定建立丰功伟业,“她说:”我认为 最重要 的是经历失败与挫折,不甘于平庸。“After Fiegerman, now 26, graduated from New York University in 2008, he landed a coveted first job as a research editor at Playboy magazine. But he had worked there for just half a year when management announced that most of the staff would soon be laid off.今年26岁的菲格曼于2008年毕业于纽约大学。大学毕业后,他拥有了一个令人艳羡的工作——《》杂志的研究编辑。但他仅仅在这个工位上工作了半年,公司就开始大规模裁人。As unemployment loomed, Fiegerman felt adrift. He began to explore the Playboy archives, discovering a trove of interviews with celebrities ranging from Marlon Brando to Malcolm X. Many of these successful people shared tales of their less promising early days, and Fiegerman quickly became obsessed with these origin stories.面对裁员的危机,菲格曼感到茫然无措。他开始研究《》杂志档案,并发行了一系列珍贵的名人访问,包括马龙白兰度(Marlon Brando,美国最棒的男演员),马尔科姆·X(Malcolm X,非裔美国人权利提倡者)等等。这些成功人士都经历了看似前途渺茫的开端,这些成功起源的故事很快吸引了菲格曼。“It kind of paired well with this feeling that I had of, ‘Oh my God, what do I do?’” Fiegerman says. “And I found solace, in some ways, ing about the obstacles that famous figures had to overcome.””这些故事与我彼时心情契合,我总在想‘老天,我该怎么办?’“菲格曼说:”在某些方面,通过阅读那些名人克困难的故事,我找到了安慰。“He began devouring biographies and soliciting interviews with writers and musicians he admired, using the blog to document the fits and starts that began the careers of the famous and the infamous. Success, he learned, was less a matter of innate talent and more the product of perseverance, a willingness to stumble and stand up again and again.他开始大量阅读传记,并恳请自己欣赏的作家和音乐家接受采访,这些人有成名的也有事业低迷的,菲格曼把他们的事业开端的起起伏伏记录进客。在调查中他发现,成功更多是源于坚持而非天赋。要有勇气屡败屡战。“You kind of assume that great geniuses are like Mozart, ” Fiegerman says. But few successful people were child prodigies, and prodigies don’t necessarily find success. “Most people don’t stick to it.””你可能觉得天才都是像莫扎特那样的,“菲格曼说。但事实是几乎没什么成功人士是神童,神童未必成功。”大多数人不喜欢坚持一件事。“Author Jennifer Egan stuck with it. She told Fiegerman that her first novel was so bad even her mother hated it. But Egan kept writing, and her writing got better—in 2011, she won a Pulitzer Prize for her novel about growing old in the digital age, A Visit From the Goon Squad.作家詹妮弗·伊根(Jennifer Egan)做到了坚持。她告诉菲格曼他的第一部小说糟到连她母亲都厌恶。但伊根并未放弃写作,而且有了进步。2011年她的一篇描绘在数字时代老去的小说《打手队的来访》(A Visit From the Goon Squad)赢得了普利策奖(Pulitzer Price,美国新闻界最高荣誉)。Knowing about a hero’s early flops and foibles might disillusion some fans, but Fiegerman finds comfort in rough beginnings. “The only thing that would have disappointed me is if I’d researched all these guys and women and found out that they got it right on the first try, because, OK, I did not, ” Fiegerman says with a laugh.了解一个英雄人物早期的失败和缺点也许会使某些粉丝的幻想破灭,但菲格曼却从中得到慰藉。”如果发现这些人首次尝试就成功我倒要失望了,因为我自己的起步并不是如此。“菲格曼笑着说。Like his subjects, Fieger-man found that his own early setback wasn’t permanent. He landed a new job in journalism, and today he works at the tech news website Mashable, covering, appropriately enough, start-up businesses. While he has less time for the blog, he hopes his collection of origin stories will help other young people realize it’s OK to fail.正如他的受访者,菲格曼发现起初的失败并不是永久的。他开始尝试记者工作,如今他在科技新闻网站Mashable工作,可以说还包含很多起步阶段的业务。虽然写客的时间少了,他希望自己收集的这些成功故事的起源可以帮助其他年轻人,告诉他们要允许失败。“I hope some of them benefit from it, ” he says. “But if nothing else, I feel like I benefited from it a little bit.””我希望有人能从中受益,“他说:”但就算没什么效果,我觉得自己已经获益良多了。“ /201303/228201Here#39;s another reason to get serious about saving — it#39;s a new year. Although the occasion isn#39;t going to turn us into smart savers, it sure is a good reminder. We all have our own methods of dealing with money, but here are a couple of saving tricks that will grow your money:又有一个原因让你认真地考虑储蓄问题了,那就是新的一年开始了。即使不能利用这个机会变成聪明的储户,这也很好地提醒了我们存钱的重要性。我们都有自己处理金钱的方法,但这里有些省钱技巧可以让你“钱生钱”:The top-down view: Instead of skimping here and there, take the top-down approach to saving money. Basically what you need to do is figure out your biggest expenses, then brainstorm ways to save and tackle the biggest expenses first.从大处着手:与其从小处抠钱节省,不如从大的方面开始存钱。基本上你需要做的就是找出最大的开,然后想办法如何从这笔最大的开中省出钱来。Improve your memory: Studies have shown that training your memory can build up a desire to save since short-term memory is linked to planning for or envisioning the future. A couple of ways to improve your memory include attaching an image to something you want to remember and practicing memorizing it over and over again, and avoiding multitasking.提高你的:有研究表明,训练可以让你有存钱的欲望,因为短期记忆与规划展望未来有关。增强的一些方式包括:把想记的东西和图像联系并且反复记忆;不要同时处理多件事。Let technology aid you: Use web tools to make it easier to budget your money. There are free site that lets you to view all of your accounts in one place and provides budgeting tools that help determine where it would be easiest to cut spending. Consider downloading apps that#39;ll help you save. There are even apps that will save you money on gas and let you text for free.使用高科技:网络工具可以让你更方便做出预算。有些免费网站可以让你在一个地方查你所有的账号,并提供预算工具帮你确定最简单的削减开的方法。考虑下载应用程序帮你省钱。Automating: The best way to make sure you#39;re saving enough is to automatically put a chunk of your money into your savings and retirement accounts every month. It#39;s generally better than relying on your willpower. If you#39;re aly automating, try to increase the amount by five percent.自动存钱:确保你攒够钱的最好方式是每月自动往储蓄账户和退休帐户转一大笔钱。通常来说,这个方法好于依靠意志力来存钱的方式。如果你已经自动转账存钱了,试着增加百分之五的储蓄量。 /201302/225601

  Without you, the moon is round though my heart is empty.没有你在我身边,天上月圆圆,我心却空落落。East or west, home is best.金窝银窝不如自己的窝。The moon cake is eaten away, but the sweetness remains.月饼已吃,甜蜜犹存。Where we love is home, home that our feet may leave, but not our hearts.家是我们情之所系的地方,虽只身在外,但心系家园。When we are together, even the moon in the sky will be jealousy.如果我们在一起,天上的月亮也会嫉妒的。My dear, can you hear my heart beating in the soft moonlight? I miss you so much.在月色廖人的夜里,我是如此的想念你,亲爱的你听到我的心跳了吗?To have a moonlight walk with you tonight is my best dream.今晚和你在月光中散步是我最大的梦想。Still remember the happy time on Mid-autumn Festival when we were children? Best wishes for you!还记得儿时我们共度的那个中秋吗?祝你节日快乐。Would you like to go and admire the beauty of the moon with me tonight?今晚能邀你一同赏月吗?Wish you and your family a happy holiday on this gathering day.在这团聚的日子里祝你全家节日快乐。内容来自: /201209/200609


  A Chinese airline has introduced Kung Fu training for their staff after a series of attacks on air stewards.在多起乘客殴打机场机组工作人员事件之后,中国一家航空公司在职员培训中加入了“功夫学习”的内容。Hong Kong Airlines said that they will teach their cabin crews wing chun, a form of Kung Fu after they experienced on average three attacks per week, reported. Attacks have been reported at airports across the country as they struggle to maintain flight times.据报道,香港航空公司表示他们将教授机组成员咏春拳(一种中国武术),因为平均每周都会有三次乘客攻击工作人员的情况出现。由于飞机很难准点起飞,几乎全国各地都曾出现过机场暴力事件。Frustrated passengers have taken their anger out on airport staff and cabin crew after a summer of delays. The staff have even invented a new phrase to describe the irate passengers, ‘king nu zu’, which translates as ‘air rage tribe’, reported The Telegraph.在漫长如夏的航班漫延误后,滞留乘客把怨气怒火转向机场工作人员。《每日电讯》报道,人们甚至给这些暴躁的乘客发明了专属名词:“空怒族”。There have been at least eight protests at departure gates in two months. More than 30 passengers stormed security and ran onto the runway on July 18 after bad weather caused seven hours of delays.两个月内,机场登机口至少出现了八起抗议事件。7月18日,一航班由于天气恶劣延误七小时起飞,30多名愤怒的乘客冲破保安阻拦,闯入飞机跑道上抗议。In another incident, two airport staff were injured when a passenger attempted to rip off an attendant’s name badge. One of the injured staff members said: ‘The passengers were very emotional and unstable.另一起事件中,一位乘客试图撕下工作人员的姓名牌,混乱中两名机场人员受伤。其中一名伤者说:“乘客的情绪非常激动,也很不稳定。”A primary teacher, Liu Weiwei, also reportedly lost control in June, when her flight from Wenzhou to Beijing was cancelled. She slapped and kicked an Air China attendant. She said the reason she did it was that no one offered her any refreshments.刘薇薇(音译)是一名小学教师,据报道,六月份当从温州飞往北京的航班取消时,她也情绪失控,对中国航空的乘务员又打又踢。事后她解释说那样做的原因是没人给她提供小点心。Sudden air traffic flowing into air ways that are controlled by the Army is one of the reasons for the issue. This is aggravated when bad weather forces airlines to delay or cancel flights.导致该现象的原因之一是大量军用飞机进入航道,致使民航重新进行调度。这一情况在天气恶劣时更为严重,许多民用航班被迫延迟或取消。 /201308/251220

  ;May I borrow your record player tonight ?; a man asked his neighbour .“今晚我可以借用以下你的唱机吗?”一个人对他的邻居说道。;Sure . Do you want to listen to some music?;“当然可以,你也想听听音乐吗?”;No .; he answered .; Tonight I want to have some peace and quiet.;“不,”他回答道,“今晚我想安安静静地休息一下。” /201301/218060


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